Saturday Night-In Thoughts.

10:40 PM

I don't go out much anymore lately, I've been enjoying a lot of family time ever since the passing of my brother. It's like I don't want to leave home anymore because it's where I feel closest to him. I feel I've changed over the last month, my thoughts and actions aren't so sudden, I think a little more before I do something, I guess you can say I'm a little more "boring", but I just want to stop and enjoy life more, because literally, we don't know when our expiration date is coming. I've given up alcohol, because I realize it's not worth the risk or pain it causes to your loved ones around you. I've also learned how to have more fun in my life without it, but I don't plan on judging anyone who drinks, just as long as it's responsible, I hope... for your sake. I've tried to become more calm in my life and erase all the negativity and ugly words I use. I want to be a more positive person and become better. I've also developed a relationship with Jesus, and it's beautiful, I want to see my brother again, and I know by him that's going to be the only way. Lately I've been finding a need to escape, so I was looking through my pictures and I found this picture of the island I took back in August 2013, it looks so relaxing and I realize I need a trip to the beach, even if it's for a day, I just want some peace and a little stress reliever. I've also been running a lot, that helps my mind, and is great for my body. It's sometimes hard to stay positive and lately all I've been wanting to do is sleep, but there's a wonderful plan ahead of me and I must continue to follow it, for myself and my brother. 
I love you Eric & we miss you. 


Somethings I've learned through all this that I'd like people to know:
  • Don't ever take advantage of ANYONE, especially family. You don't ever know if a family gathering will be the last one as a whole, or if this is your/someone's last hour, day, month, year to live.
  • Talking about emotions aloud with someone you trust helps, oh and cry...cry, cry, cry, till you can't anymore, it feels good and relieves emotions. 
  • Know your alcohol intake or have a designated driver, whether it's yourself or the person next to you on the road, something can go wrong.
  • IT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU.
  • Take time to appreciate everything around you and give thanks every now and then
  • Trust the changes in your lives that are happening, something good must come out of it.
xx

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